What If It’s All an Illusion? A Twin Flame Question That Haunts the Heart

Twin Flame: When love feels eternal but uncertain—can two decades of longing really be just an illusion? Or is it the soul remembering what the mind forgets?

A Twin Flame Question That Haunts the Heart

The thought of losing him—even just in my thoughts—makes my entire body tremble. It’s not fear in the usual sense. It’s deeper. Like someone asking me to cut off a part of myself and continue breathing as if nothing’s missing.

There are days I sit with this question like a weight on my chest: What if it’s all an illusion?

When Love Feels Like a Lifetime of Longing

Astrologically, they say Rahu—the North Node—gives illusions. Obsessive love. Possessive love. The maddening ache of unattained love. A connection that consumes, not because it’s real, but because it feels real.

And if I’m being honest with myself—and I try to be—I ask the same thing: What if this is Rahu? What if I’ve built an empire of feelings on something that was never mine?

But then, if this is an illusion, why doesn’t the universe do anything to pull me out of it?

Why doesn’t it crash the illusion down like it does with everything else that isn’t meant for us? Why has it let this live inside me for so long?

Two Decades and Still, He’s There: My Twin Flame

This isn’t a passing phase. It’s not a fleeting crush.

It’s been two decades.

Consistent. Relentless. Quiet some days, deafening on others. And sure, I’ve tried to walk away. Many times. I’ve blocked him, cut cords, deleted photos, done meditations to release, mantras to let go, therapy to move on.

But nothing changes.

In fact, every time I try to push him away, I end up feeling even more drawn to him.

It’s maddening. It sounds like I’m insane. I’ve thought that too. But how long can you call something a delusion when it becomes your everyday reality?

Does the Universe Let You Stay Lost in the Twin Flame illusion for That Long?

Maybe the universe doesn’t interfere in illusions.

Maybe it lets you live it until you can no longer hold it. Until it breaks you open and forces you to see what’s real, what’s not. Or maybe—just maybe—it’s not an illusion at all.

Maybe the universe sees this love as sacred, and it’s just not time yet. Maybe it’s less about getting him and more about understanding myself through him.

Or maybe the universe is simply watching me love with a purity that doesn’t need an outcome.

Maybe that’s the lesson.

But What If I’m Right?

What if I’m not delusional?
What if loving him like this is part of my path?
What if this isn’t about union or validation or having him by my side—but about accepting a connection that defies reason and time and still holds power?

And what if—just what if—this love wasn’t meant to save me or break me, but just to exist inside me?

Would that be enough?

I don’t know.

What I do know is this: I’ve tried to forget. I’ve tried to let go. But his presence is like a heartbeat—unseen, but always there.

So maybe this isn’t a question for the mind to answer. Maybe it’s something only the soul understands.

And maybe… that’s okay.

The End. Thank you for reading.

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Do check out my other articles on Twin Flames.

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Author Payal Dedhia independently publishes books on Amazon Kindle. You can check her collection by clicking here.

If you like Dark Romance Fiction, do read my Scintilla Series. Click here to read.

Aayansh Ahluwalia isn’t just a billionaire business tycoon—he’s the kind of man who haunts people’s nightmares. The world may recognize Scintilla Corporations as a legitimate empire, but Aayansh isn’t confined to the light. In the shadows, he commands an empire of fear, power, and blood. He rules over the underdogs, the darkness that terrifies everyone else.
Ruthless and untouchable, they call him a devil for a reason—he doesn’t flinch, doesn’t hesitate, doesn’t blink when it comes to taking lives.
His existence is fearless. His power, unmatched. Yet beneath the wealth and carnage lies a void—a darkness so complete it consumes him. There’s no light, no hope. Just emptiness stretching endlessly, leaving him hollow.
Then, one night, everything changed.
He saw her—a woman so radiant, so full of life, she made his chaos stand still. She erupted into his world like a dream, settling in his heart and claiming it as her own.
Tisha Chopra.
Aayansh hadn’t been searching for her, hadn’t asked for her. But the moment he saw her, he knew—she would be his.
She didn’t belong in his world, and that only made him want her more. Her laughter, her light—it wasn’t meant to survive the darkness he thrived in, yet it pulled him in, unrelenting. Like a predator to prey, he followed. He didn’t want her to save him. No. He wanted to ruin her, piece by piece, until she belonged to him completely. He would drag her down, crown her queen in his Devil’s Paradise, and make her sit beside him on the devil’s throne while he ruled the world.

What unfolds is a story steeped in obsession, control, and desire—a dangerous game where love is a battlefield, and submission comes at the cost of a soul.
Scintilla isn’t just the name of Aayansh’s empire; it’s the pulse of this saga—a place where power thrives and morality dies.

The series is divided into four phases:

🔥 The Chase – Where the predator finds his prey. Click here to read.

1. The Beginning – A collision of worlds. A spark ignited.
2. Unveiling Paradise – Her light tempts the darkness.
3. The Masked Guy – Secrets wear masks. So do devils.
4. Unleashing the Demons – Once awakened, there’s no turning back.
5. The Winner – Victory tastes sweeter when claimed by force.

🔥 The Possession – Where obsession takes root. Click here to read.

1. New Beginning – The chase ends. The real game begins.
2. The Rules – Boundaries are set, only to be broken.
3. Gilded Cage – Possession doesn’t feel like freedom.
4. Unleashed Fury – When control falters, chaos reigns.
5. Ensnared Hearts – Hearts trapped, souls scarred.

🔥 The Submission – Where surrender is demanded, not given. Click here to read.

1. Her Resistance – Light fights back. Darkness pushes harder.
2. Her Confession – Truths whispered in the dark.
3. The Good Times – A fleeting calm before the storm.
4. The Devil Struck – The predator strikes. The angel shatters.
5. Angel’s Judgement – When love turns to reckoning.

🔥 The Reward – Where love and darkness collide, leaving nothing unscarred. Click here to read.

1. The Storm – Chaos erupts, tearing apart the fragile ties of love and power.
2. The Punishment – Sins are judged, debts are paid, and vengeance claims its due.
3. Maalik – Sneak peek into Maurya Ahluwalia’s life
4. The Aftermath – Amid the wreckage, the cost of darkness comes to light.
5. Devastation – Another peek at Akhil and Inaaya’s life.
6. The Dawn – Hope flickers, fragile and hesitant, in the ruins of despair.
7. Devil’s Endgame – It’s time for the final move. What would be the devil’s endgame?

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The Arranged Marriage series is a collection of 5 books.

Book 1 – The First Meet (Read now)

Book 2: The Life Together (Read now)

Book 3 – The Surprises in Store (Read now)

Book 4 – The Everchanging Times (Read now)

Book 5: The Story of Us (Coming Soon)

The Unscripted Love Series is a collection of 10 books

Book 1 – Arjun’s Jenny (click to read)

Book 2 – Priti’s Rendezvous with Somesh (click to read)

Book 3 – Rana’s Vivacious Girlfriend (click to read)

Book 4 – Claire’s Dashing Raj (click to read)

Book 5 – My Rebirth (click to read)

Book 6 – My Family (click to read)

Book 7 – My Sister’s Wedding (click to read)

Book 8 – My Secret Love (click to read)

Book 9 – My Silent Romeo (click to read)

Book 10 – The Brunch (click to read)

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